Speechless...

I'm terribly sorry, you cannot use your HISTORY books for your PHILOSOPHY class next semester. Unless of course you are planning on failing it, which is highly likely. And while you are at it, try using your LITERATURE book for your STATISTICS class. If you get a bad grade just tell your teacher we sold it to you. Usually does wonders and gets you whatever you want, you poor soul at our mercy.

"do you take cash?"

+We do not accept cash.
+I can NOT help you!
+I do NOT work here!
+Checks are unacceptable (so are cards)

Sure! I'll refund you fully, IN cash, regardless of how you paid! (No, you don't need your receipt!) The return deadline is more a suggestion... YOU KNOW WHAT!? We don't even need the book[s] here!!

Oh?! Those signs?! I didn't even realized I put those there!!

Oh yes!! One more thing! WE NEVER CLOSE!!! (NOR ARE WE EVER OPEN!)

get a clue. you're in college!

SSN strikes again...

Dude... you have financial aid.. why in the heck would I want to steal your identity?!?! and even if you didn't give me your social, i still have access to it!! so get a grip!

Truth: Talk To Your Kids...!

I hate rush!

'nuff said.

whoops!

you know you are dealing with rush head when you try to scan the books with a stapler... :)

could you please...

today i handed a woman her receipt and asked her to stand behind it....

things we say over and over and over and over and......

"yes I really need you SS#"
"No you can't give my your student id#"
"yes that really is the right book"
"yes i'm serious the book costs $85.05 (stmartins guide..lol) and that really isn't a bad price!"
"yes i've heard it a million times that this is a racket, that you should go into the publishing/bookstore business.."
"PLEASE WAIT IN LINE BEHIND THE TAPE ON THE FLOOR!!!!"
"can i use my boucher??" ya mean your voucher?! sure...
"*blank stare*" oh you must have SFA


oh i could go on....

computer books do not equal micro books... der

Apparently people aren't just stupid in the bookstore... they are stupid in class too.. this kid in my micro class says to the teacher, "um.. i think the bookstore gave me the wrong book..." he pulls out a stinkin computer book!!! the teacher is like, "well, that's actually a computer book.. are you taking a computer class?" he's like, "oh yeah... never mind."

Really?!?! Seriously?! I almost started laughing at him!!

The Library is where you borrow books....

The poor librarians here.. I just walked into the library and posted on their white board is a notice to students, "You are in the Bentley Library. The Bookstore is located next door in the Student Center." I talked to the librarians and they get TONS of questions about buying books here. They even get lots of questions with the sign up clearly stating that this isn't the bookstore. So, Dan.. don't feel bad.. it's not that they don't notice your signs.. they just don't notice ANY signs!!

ROFL!!

Ok, so, if we tell you that you need to go to class before you can buy your books.. that means.. you need to wait until classes start, go to the class in the assigned room at the assigned time, and get a stinkin syllabus. Not brain surgery people!!

This guy asked us if he could just go to class now and get the book info... I nearly died.. I thought I had it under control but I decided to play it safe and head to the back room... quickly!! Dan almost kept his cool but then he saw me loosing it and ran after me. We died laughing. I hope the guy didn't hear us...

END OF THE LINE!!

I have three signs saying "Line Starts Here" (but they're not that noticable... It's more so to point at and say "can you stand by that sign please? thanks.")

So, today, me being my verbally articulate self said "If you're selling your books, can you please start a line over here!" It's not some much a question as it is a forceful favor. "...and by SELLING I'm mean PURCHASING..." =\
(Woooops!) My-B...

So, everyone laughs at my vocab mix-up and so do I, after all I was very adament with that statement only to realize I made a fool of myself...haha! I'd much rather laugh at myself anyway.

One guy didn't quite understand that sentance though, so I told him once more... "Sir, You have to stand in line to purchase your textbooks." (very calmy I may add...)
He responds with a mumble about how he's not buy books... but something else...

?!!?!?!!?!?!?!!!

So, I reply "Sir, It doesn't matter WHAT you're purchasing... You still have to wait in line."
"Oh."

?!

I didn't know whether I wanted to LAUGH or SCREAM/CRY... =(

are you kidding me?

"Hate is a strong word but I really, Really, REALLY don't like YOU!!!"

I'm really annoyed with the new SFA filing thing that's happening... It makes it "easier" because I don't have to type in EVERYONE'S socials... but NO ONE KNOWS WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!!!

It's your money, you think you'ld actually keep track of it...!!!

I also hate returns/exchanges/buybacks/ everything else!!
I don't want to be doing a SFA exchange for 20 minutes!!! REALLY?!!! ARGH!! and crap!

WE HAVE A 10 DAY WAIT PERIOD FOR CHECKS!!! GET OVER IT!!! COME BACK ON THE TENTH DAY!!!

i hate rush.

*Cue Dumb Stare*

How hard is it to get up to the registers and say to the cashier something along the lines of:
"I have financial aid"

I'm not looking for a detailed description of your problems... or even for you to give me any more info than that..

But for goodness sake don't just stare at me when I tell you the total. Seriously!! Go take an Interpersonal Communications class!!

Speak a little louder, I'm a little hard of hearing...

Okay...
So I understand you don't want to shout out your SSN for the entire world to hear... but seriously, I have an ancient barcode printer, several cash registers being used, and a store full of people who enjoy I nice LOUD conversation. Please!!

You don't have to shout it, just loud enough so I don't have to ask you to repeat several times! (It defeats the perpose of speaking quietly anyway!)

Also...
SLOW DOWN!
I know I'm pretty fast with the register (thank you)
But I don't know your SSN!! It takes time for my brain to register what it hears and type it on the keypad!

AND ANOTHER THING!!
DICTION!!!

Nigh-Fie-Fo-AY-Sih-Tree-Oh is not a number!!

(NINE-FIVE-FOUR-EIGHT-SIX-THREE-ZERO!!)
I know it's a lot to ask for some... but I speak English... as long as you say the numbers in ENGLISH--- I don't care WHAT you call me in whatever language you speak at home!

(I'm not racist, I'm just stressed!)

"Here, they said......."

Financial Aid is sending people to the bookstore and telling them that they need their schedules to buy their books. TECHNICALLY this is correct. You need your schedule so that we can find your books so that you can buy them. The students, of course, took that to mean that their schedule is some sort of credit card. I had so many people walk up to me today at the register, and hand me their schedule.
"Here, they said that I needed this to buy my books."

What the heck am I supposed to do with that?!?!?!
Scan it?!
Swipe it?!
Shred it?!

Mostly I just said, "Oh, thanks" pushed it to the side and scanned their books in.

2 ways to prove I'm dumber than you!

1. You hand the customer their bag of books they've already purchased and say, "Just sign here, please!" (I mean... Have a great day!) =\

2. You sign the credit card receipt! (Ooops!! I mean... Can I have YOUR signature please???)

not a good day.

Here's your sign!

today i had a mother and a son walk out of the store with books...

I stop them and say: "did you pay for those yet?"

and he replies with, "I have fincancial aid."

"You need to purchase them here before you take you books out of the store!"

"Oh... I didn't know that."

this is understandable.
They assumed since they were paying through financial aid that they were free (because they didn't have to pay out of pocket...)

I get it!

But when I make a sign posted on both doors stating:

Ooops!

Did you purchase your books?

Whether you're paying with cash, check, card, or ANY form of student loan/financial aid,

YOU MUST BUY YOUR BOOKS BEFORE YOU LEAVE THE STORE!

Thank you!

I would assume that it wouldn't happen again...

but it did.

no lie.

immediately after I posted the signs,

a father and son walk out of the store with the books

and again (not five minutes after) I ask:

"did you pay for your books yet?"

same excuse.

:(

hello, rush.

SFA

Financial Aid starts today! :P

hell is on it's way...
and it's a week early!

Ahhhh!

I remember you......... NOT!!!

I love it when people come in and just stand there looking at you and they say, "I'm here to get my books."

I always want to reply with, "OHH right!!! I have your books right here in a special pile JUST for you!!! How wonderful that you finally came in!! What's your name again?!?!?!?!"

PEOPLE!!! Bring in your schedules!! Don't just stare at us and look dumb.. please! It's really annoying..

"Oh my god!"

I never realized how funny phone messages were!!

:0)

If we don't pick up it's because we're on the other line,

or we're too busy to answer the phone...

LOL!

people are funny.

Dan's Condition

Not only do I have to deal with the mental and emotional strains of customer service...

But I also have to deal with this!!

Dermographia, also known as dermatographia, is a skin disorder that causes itchy, red lines to appear when a person affected with the disorder scratches his or her skin. The lines that appear from dermographia are not serious, but they can be itchy and uncomfortable. In addition, these lines can last for several minutes after scratching is complete.

In a person with dermographia, specific skin cells called mast cells have a tendency to be overly sensitive when they experience minor trauma, such as that experienced when a person scratches his or her skin. When a person with dermographia scratches his or her skin, it causes the mast cells to release special chemicals called histamines. When histamines are released in a person with dermographia, the small blod vessels dilate. As the blood vessels dilate, or widen, it causes the characteristic redness and itching associated with dermographia.

In some cases, antihistamines are prescribed to help treat dermographia. Other times, the dermographia goes away on its own. For some people, the condition never really goes away.

I need to think of a title besides "really?!" but it's hard...

I hate it when people come into the store and complain in front of me about the store's policies or the buyback prices. Like really?! I'm right here! I can hear you! Go away if you think it's such a scam! Don't take the money!

Grrrrrrrrrrr.....

Blast[s] from the Past

...I haven't seen these kids in over 8 years...!!

and they still think they're the shizzz!!

GROW UP!
you go to fricken' community college;
by default your coolness factor has dwindled down to zer0!

Really?!

Ah! Dan beat me to it!! Oh well.. here's my vent for the day..

I AM NOT THE STINKIN' WELCOME DESK!!!!
I WORK IN A BOOKSTORE!!
DON'T ASK ME ABOUT THE SHUTTLE SCHEDULE
DON'T ASK ME ABOUT YOUR ID CARDS
DON'T ASK ME WHEN SCHOOL STARTS (you really should know that already)
DON'T ASK ME TO PRINT YOUR SCHEDULE

*speaks in a monotone* the last day to return your books is september 16th you need to have your receipt and all books that are wrapped need to be wrapped in order to get the refund.... have a nice day.

The Blog That Doesn't Exist: THE RESURRECTION

It's coming back!

FALL 2009

NEW STUDENTS!!

SOME NEW WORKERS!

SAME OLD [stupid] QUESTIONS!!

Read it all,

our ventilation blog for college booksellers...

or anyone else that feels like venting about their workplace.

(p.s. we were never here!)

Common Sense

Recently someone came into the store and just stood there. Dan and I were putting candy away and I decided to see how long it would take this guy to ask for help. Five minutes later he was standing there just staring at the candy and Dan finally asked him if he needed help. They guy says, "umm yeah... I'm looking for a pencil....." Those would be over there with all the other pencils... not with the candy!!

H2O

Meg: NECC Bookstore, this is Meg. How can I help you?

Woman: I was wondering if you carried 1.5 liter bottles of water?

Meg: ...Like to drink???

....................

WHY?!?!
Why do you have to be rude and nasty? Can't you just be polite? Is it really that hard? Does it somehow make you feel better to ruin my day? Can't you see that I'm trying? Does that matter at all?

Next time please take your head phones out, speak nicely, don't accuse me, and for goodness sake have some patience.
I don't like dealing with you just as much as you don't like paying for your books.
The one difference is this: I get paid to deal with you! You just shell out cash! That amuses me!!

So, thank you for taking up 15 minutes of my time and allowing me to earn less than $2. I appreciate you!

Really?!

Today someone asked where the books were!!!!!! That's almost as good as "where are the shelves" and "is this the bookstore?"

SFA

I love it when you ask someone for their Social Security number.
"Can I have your social and I need to see an Id please."
"Um.............. can I give you my School id number?"
"No. I need your Social."
"Oh...."

Then there's the person that leans in way to close and whispers their numbers after glancing both ways to make sure no one is too close. My favorite thing to do is repeat it louder. Kinda defeats the secrecy. Do people really think that someone is behind them with a pad of paper writing it down?! If you are going to NECC, you probably don't have a ton of money, especially if you are using Financial Aid.

Price Differences

Today I had a customer argue with me over a $5 difference in price for a book. Then a couple minutes later another lady argued with me over a $1 difference. Then, as if that wasn't enough, another lady argued with me about a freakin $0.80 difference!!!!!! After she left I curled up in a ball under Tina's desk. Someone asked where I was and she said I was under there and then she says, "Yes, I really just said Meg is under my desk." It was very funny... in hindsight...

Yet again...

I had another saran wrap customer. This time he not only saran wrapped his books.. he pulled the stickers off the original plastic and re-stuck them to the saran wrap. Just thought I should share that.....

Saran Wrap

Today someone came in with one of the algebra packages and wanted to return it. He had opened it, but seemed to think that we are all idiots at the bookstore. The book was saran wrapped very neatly. I pretended that I had to ask my manager about allowing him to return the book and proceeded to march it around the bookstore. Tina had a coughing fit she laughed so hard. Heather and George couldn't believe it. So, I walked back to the window, carefully unwrapped the saran wrap, and calmly told the guy, "Next time you return your books can you please try to keep them in their original plastic?"

Note about the Disclaimer.

Can I just say, that now that I don't work there anymore, this blog seems SO much funnier!
Oh and the disclaimer made me giggle!



I really do miss all of you though!

Lollipops

The other day I was coughing and there was this little girl right there. I was behind the registers and she was standing in front of them. I don't think her head came above the counter. She says in the tiniest voice possible, "Are you ok?!" I couldn't even hear her so I had her repeat what she said. It was so stinkin adorable!! I just had to give her a lollipop!!

Wow... I finally thought of something cute and funny... I was drawing a blank this semester around. The real posts will start next week!! Let the insanity begin!!! (someone shoot me.. maybe I'll just shoot myself in the foot.. the I will have to call in sick.. hmm... :P)

Urban Dictionary [dot com]

Customer

An incredibly stupid person. These people are often found in department and grocery stores and show no signs of common sense. Many times they can be rude, cruel, and obnoxious.

This store has too many horrible customers ruining our job.

(now i'm just being vindictive...) :'[

Online Orders...

take up to 10 days to process.
we close at 5 (7 during our extended hours...)

Do not place an order at nine pm and come in the next day when we open...YOUR ORDER WILL NOT BE READY!!!

thank you!

FIRST RUSH OF THE YEAR!!! :\

So, it's a new year and a new semester, which means...ANOTHER RUSH!! >:P

So, to start of easy and slow, I'll tell about a qiuck phone coversation.
(the question get a lot worse as the rush approaches...)

RING*RING*
"NECC bookstore, This is Dan. How may I help you?"
"Hi Dan, Are you guys open right now?"
"Uhh...Um, Yes! Yes, We are open RIGHT now..!"
"What time do you close today?"
"We close at seven o'clock this week...."

Just so ya'll know, I only like to answer the phone when we're closed! Actually, I live at the bookstore...and although it says we open at nine EVERYWHERE!! If you call around 11:00 am We'll be closed...! Just call us, and if someone answers, then we not open! :\